No Swearing Allowed!
Oh damn bloody bottle of wine won't open, now I won't be able to heal this freaking loneliness and depression. F**k, w**k, shitting arse head and hole, and the cigarettes are all in the litter after my last attempt to quit smoking, what a f***ing wonderful world!
Don't ever let your Mr. Right see this side of yours in case your split personality can secretly 'boast' it. Don't ever try to swear in front of your man, because even though most of the time he swears very hard whenever he watches football, complains about his boss, is very depressed and stressed out, to cut a long story short, he swears hard very often, and you are not allowed to swear.
An image of a 'lady' who swears like hell because she cannot open a bottle of wine – she most likely drinks alone trying to soothe her depression and eternal loneliness – and realizes that she has thrown out all her cigarettes in the litter bin is just so totally unappealing and hardly ever sexy (even though a few perverted males do consider smoking women sexy, but they are just a minority of perverts).
Although your mister is a sinful swearer at times, he will hardly ever be pleased with the fact that his perfect lady's mouth can produce such shocking even for the air sounds and words as in the vivid example before.
And even though your mister is very into playing hard and active in bed (wants you to be equally hard and active) where you trust each other completely and i.e. he can allow himself a few verbally hard descriptions of his or your condition or a certain event, still, your perfect man will most likely prohibit you to swear when you are in public – visiting someone together or just walking along the street.
The image of a swearing chick is associated with something very unappealing and dirty, something which hardly ever coincides with males' pure and charming image of a fair lady which he bears in his hardly ever pure and innocent mind.
Of course, the situation is unfair again – your Mr. Right is allowed to swear whenever he wants to and you should put up with it or only gently hint at it without hurting his fragile feelings, and you are prohibited from all relaxation procedures possible, even from occasional verbal expression of your outrageous condition.
In any case, we are sure my dear ladies that you were taught in your early childhood, that swearing is bad indeed. It's not that you will be immediately severely punished by your perfectly swearless man if you accidentally produce a few swearings when being in an angry mood, it's just that he will most likely pay special attention to them and will tell you that he doesn't want the situation to repeat ever again.
He will be right to do it, and the issue is not about justice and the fact that he is allowed to swear and you aren't. Being a mature perfect lady of your perfect gent, you should realize yourself how harmful and just how very non-aesthetic female swearing sounds. If your gentleman isn't perfect enough in this sense either, try to kindly and gently convey to him that you aren't very satisfied with his swearing either. He already considers you his perfect woman, so most probably he will follow this constructive advice of yours. If not – you can always f***ing kill the idiot and forget about any restrictions. Just kidding regarding the latter entertaining lines ;)